how do you feel about naked man-on-man tumbling?

does your vagine (pronouced vag-eeene) flap in the wind? do you think other countries are run by little girls? if you agree, go see BORAT!

i think all of the Borat clips floating around the internet, between YouTube and MySpace are actually better than the entire movie itself. it was funny, i laughed out loud a lot, i covered my eyes more times than i could count and felt embarassed almost every 5 minutes througout the movie.

the movie felt like deja vu at many points, not because i know a Kasakhstani just like Borat or that i experienced so many experience just like the broken-english speaking, large mustache-wearing sexist pig, but that i had already seen most of the good parts in the previews. much like Ricky Bobby, the best parts were already given away in the previews. WHY DO THEY DO THAT? then instead of lauging at that point in the movie, i go..."ha," (with no actual laugh, just words).

you will most likely feel embarassed for Borat a lot, feel offended (very offended if you do not realize that he is jewish, and makes ridiculous jewish jokes...i.e. "the running of the jews" in his town). many people were gasping...yes, there were maybe too many un-PC comments or jokes for the blue state of Illinoians, but you have to understand Sacha Baron Cohen's humor and know his track record. he is known for fully committing to a character (Alli G) and convincing those that he interviews (of course, that don't already know that he is just an actor, not some British eminem wanna be) that he is who he says he is and is from a legitimate news syndicate/broadcasting company.

i give this movie 3 and a quarter stars (imagine Ed McMahon on Star Search)...hilarious, shocking, great use of stereotypes (frat boys, southerners, texas COWBOYS! AMERICA, FUCK YEAH!). the reason i can't give it a 4 is that it wasn't all new material for my eyes and honestly there were some Broke Back Mountain parts in the movie that i would have been totally fine without seeing. and i'm not talking about 2 studs (gyllenho & heathy), i'm talking about 2 extremely hairy men, one extremely large. not to give it away...or anything.

the funniest thing about this movie is that over 5 million people (or more) will probably see this movie and the fact that they will all experience the man-on-man naked tumbling for almost over 5 minutes, makes me crack up everytime i think about it!

THAT IS NICEEEEEEEEEEE.

(note: would have been posted earlier if blogger was able to load pics!)

and the D makes the NYT

pretty sweet that the D made it into the NYT...but of course, it was an error! read this hilarious Gawker account of the error...

'NYT' A Little Confused On This Whole Midwest Thing

We're not sure what's going on over at the Times, but they might want to get a man to Michigan pronto:

(when i did an image search for "Detroit" this is what popped up. just grand)

A chart with The Fifth Down column in Sports on Oct. 25, which ranked the top five states that produced the most N.F.L. players on opening-day rosters this season, gave the incorrect ranking in some copies for two states and omitted a state. The correct rankings: California is first (206 players); Florida is second (177); Texas is third (175); Ohio is fourth (83); and Georgia is fifth (80). Because the city of Detroit was listed as a state, in third place, the rankings for Texas and Ohio were incorrect and Georgia was omitted.

Okay, it happens: if not an actual, star-on-the-flag, state, the D is at least a state of mind. Plus, they've got a wide variety of sports teams:
An entry in the News Summary on Saturday misstated the name of the team that the St. Louis Cardinals defeated to win the World Series. It was the Detroit Tigers, not the Detroit Lions.
Yes, it was an ugly loss. Still, it's pretty impressive for a football team to advance all the way to the World Series. Asking them to put four wins together this season was probably unreasonable.
Corrections: For the Record [NYT]

Anna Nicole, it would be so much easier if you just ordered off of Baby Toupee.com

apparently Anna Nicole Smith-Marshall-Stern has been dying her new baby, Dannilyne Hope Marshall Stern's hair darker to match her new (under Bohemian law) husband's, Howard Stern's dark jew fro. true or not? it's quite funny...and Larry Birkhead is taking it seriously, man!

anna nicole never finds the easy way out, all she had to do is go on BabyToupee.com and get her little guy "the samuel l."

Attorney: Anna Nicole may have dyed baby's hair

LOS ANGELES, California (AP) -- An attorney for the ex-boyfriend of TV reality star Anna Nicole Smith said she believes that Smith dyes her new daughter's hair.
The model, who usually sports platinum blonde hair, may have dyed her infant daughter's locks to make it appear the father is Smith's current companion, Debra Opri said Monday.
Smith's ex-boyfriend Larry Birkhead, who claims he is the father, saw the child with dark hair in leaked snippets of an "Entertainment Tonight" interview of Smith, Opri said.
"It's horrendous," Opri said. "We are calling our experts right now to see if dyeing an infant's hair is any way toxic or harmful to a child."
Birkhead frosts the tips of his sandy blonde hair. Smith's current companion, Howard K. Stern, appears to have naturally black hair.

[from CNN.com]

just in time for lunch...

found this gem on PEREZ...

lohan can't escape the hues of orange/red...or spewing...

just F-in priceless

since BUCKWILD <-- click on this to go to her MySpace (pronouced: buck-whyyy-ald) from VH1's Flavor of Love 2, didn't seem to have the modeling or porn star thing going for her post-show, looks like eBay will work aiiiiight for her. our little white-black girl (no one is still sure that her accent is "real") is selling her k-swiss white sneaker on eBay that she threw at New York on the Flavor of Love 2:Reunion Special.

PerezHilton.com reports:

Buckwild is selling on eBay the shoe she chucked at New York's head on the Flavor of Love season 2 reunion special.

She says, "If you want I can autograph it for you. It's Time to Get Buckwild!!!!!!!"

bonus: also a random chic from vegas just popped out Flav's numero siete (7) nino. at this point, these children are like collecting beanie babies...and he's not stopping until he's got 10...naturally enough for a football team. my prediction is that deelishis will have babies #8 & #9 and psycho New York will have baby #10, after he rejects her for the 5th time.

and the quote of the day is....

Asked in September to describe his dream girl, Flav told PEOPLE:

"I want a girl who looks good when she wakes up in the morning. We could take her face and dip it in dough and she'll make some nice face cookies. Some girls wake up, man, you could put their face in dough and you'll get a gorilla cookie, for real!"


face cookies boyeeeeeeeee. face cookies, FOR REAL! because a ridiculously good looking guy like flavor flav only deserves a hot model, not some hood rat chick!

BREAKING: ARE HALLOWEEN COSTUMES GETTING TOO SEXY?

wow TODAY SHOW...where have you been? trapped in a closet with jumpers and pleated pants? or maybe just stuck in Talbots?

the funniest thing about this story on TODAY this morning "Are Halloween Costumes too sexy?" is that they had conservative annoying news woman, Ann Curry wearing a Cher outfit for their "Divas" theme for the ladies of TODAY, where there were numerous cut-outs in her camel-toe enhancing tight black jump suit. Come on, it's way too early in the morning for a full-on Ann Curry Cher rendition, Al Roker could have done better.

so before the TODAY SHOW correspondents came out in their much awaited costumes for Halloween, they had a story about SEXY costumes. they were in this supposed "halloween store" but within 5 minutes of talking to the creepy store owner (mind you, wearing a hugh hefner smoking jacket with nothing underneath it), they finally came clean and mentioned they were in a "supply store for exotic dancers." wow TODAY, I wonder why the costumes were so SEXY in there?

i am 2 years removed from college now and halloween costumes for girls have been more sexy since we all sprouted boobies. although every year i go for the laughs then for the whistles on halloween, i just think that people are "sexy" on halloween because they are not creative or don't have enough guts to actually wear something that is more of a costume, but have the guts to wear something you would find on the stages of your regular Deja Vu or V.I.P's.

want to watch the shocking report on TODAY?

want to see Ann Curry's Cher suit and then puke in your mouth?

and the quote of the day is...

i know it's only 10am here in chicago...but i have to deem this lohan quote, the quote of the day because honestly, i am not sure anything else will top this today. i look forward to being challenged.

you might remember that confusing and extensive diagram of the love of l.lo in PEOPLE. i posted about it, it took forever...there were so many "lovas" i didn't know where to begin and when it actually was going to end. to affirm speculation that she lets all the boys ride on her strawberry bike, coming straight from the raunchy gossip capital of London, here we have it:

"Sex And The City changed everything for me because those girls would just sleep with so many people. And that's me. I'm not dating just one person. It is the variety of partners everyone likes, especially at my age. I'm like Angelina Jolie, taking on lovers. I don't need a steady relationship. I mean if the sex is bad, the relationship's not going anywhere. Anyway, I don't even think I have had my best kiss yet. My mom's going to kill me for talking about sleeping with people!"

[source: News of the World]

benihana, beni-douche bag

[wow, do they look happy]

rocky aoki, the famed owner of Benihana restaurants...is nuts!

[Back then, Rocky was rolling. In 1964, just two decades after World War II, he had struck gold with a Japanese gimmick as American as the fortune cookie (invented by another Japanese guy, in San Francisco): the Benihana restaurant on West 56th Street, which popularized Japanese food by juggling it in the air. By 1979, Benihana was a multi-million-dollar company with locations across the world, and Rocky was on his way to the cover of Newsweek, the poster boy for immigrant success. “I was like Trump,” brags Rocky, whose hair is still as distinctive as the Donald’s: a tightly permed Jheri curl he says he adopted in the sixties so that white people could tell him apart from other Asians. “Anything to promote my company, I did it. Richard Branson? He copy me.”] <--- oh, what a quote that is.

read the full article here: Rocky's Family Horror Show (source: NY Mag)

"celebrities are idiots too" -- Halloween edition

here are some of the celeb halloween pics i gathered on the internet today. i'm sure there will be more popping up as the week goes on...

although BWE warned people not to be Steve Irwin, Bill Maher someone how thought it was funny...even after the South Park controversy, where they parioed the famed crocodile hunter's death. not only is Bill Maher really annoying, his nose is way too big to even pass as Steve Irwin and Mr. P.C., funny man really lacks creativity....boooooooooo, tasteless.


brandon davis couldn't of been more revoluntionary and creative with his costume choice. slim jim guy or just that greasy idiot with verbal diarreah. i'll take the latter...


jared leto dressed up as that one dancer in "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun," SJP's debut 80s flick. actually it's just another regular outfit for the bad actor turned bad singer/i wear black make- up, i'm so emo and rock, bow down to me i am JORDAN CATALANO! actually all he did last week was attack a blogger because he's so emo and can't stand bloggers! (i just wanted to post this picture so that you could get a good look at his nipples)

and...someone actually wore the BORAT sexy bathing suit for halloween! he obviously was "naughty borat"...i mean you can't do halloween unless you do it "sexy" "naughty" or "bad!"!

this is grounds for leaving the "whitey" myspace

you just can't make this kind of stuff up! thanks, "tyrone"

niggaspace is an actual myspace type of website...obviously for your more PC type of myspacers.

WEB SITE N-WORD OUTRAGE
By BRIGITTE WILLIAMS-JAMES

October 29, 2006 -- A new Web site owned by an 18-year-old New Jersey native is causing controversy because of its use of the n-word.
It's called NiggaSpace.com - and it mimics the popular myspace.com site.

The owner - who goes by the name Tyrone, and won't reveal his race - said "this is no way meant to be racist, my biggest intention is to change the connotation of the word."
Despite Tyrone's pie-in-the-sky hopes, the name had African-American city leaders outraged.

"That's insane!" said City Councilman Charles Barron. "People need to understand that you don't take a word meaning lowlife and worst kind of human being and use it like that.
"We need to call ourselves more royal things, like kings and queens, not that word."

When asked if he would ever shut the site down or change the name, Tyrone adamantly said, "No! The only time I would consider it is if it comes to the point where everyone is offended by it."

[source: NYPost)

[disclaimer: in no way do I support this site or the use of the n-word]