WHERE ARE YOU LOHAN?

what a weak week in gossip. LOHAN has been off the radar for weeks now, where is she? is she in rehab? on a really long shopping trip? the pink taco? has anyone seen her...?

on another note...the TODAY is getting more annoying than ever, but one thing really helped TODAY redeem itself. A crazed Roker fan had a sign up while Al was trying to send it over to your dumb ass weather reporter in "your neck of the woods" that read:

AL ROKER IS BRINGING SEXY BACK!

watch out JT..."you ready!?!"

[insert BBQ Pork Spare-Ribs recipe here]

here's the speed talker's gossip round-up for the week thus far: Nicole Ritchie: STILL SKINNY- food to be entered in mouth sometime this year; Lohan is no where to be found? (did anyone check Karl Lagerfeld's house?); bradgelina hanging with their kids, taking the usual rickshaw ride in india/cambodia/singapore/whathaveyou; Paris got BANGS! not BANGED! so super exciting!;Lance Armstrong defending his un-gayness was quoted saying:"We tried it [being gay]. Wasn't for us."(Matteo or Gyllenhall?); Jerry Springer struggles through another mamba on DWTS; another hollywood break-up, so typical! Nicky & the short dude from Entourage break-up after she finds out he got a BJ'er from some 18 yr old random who has a MYSPACE! (surprise, surprise and is now set to private, damn)

nothing really funny happened, except for that guy deemed the #1 douchebag, Aleksey Vayner. the guy who made a VIDEO RESUME and sent it to a banking company was covered heavily by GAWKER this week and even Matt Lauer got in on the action! watch the douche in action here!

peace out homes. and now officially ovvvvva the hump.